Finding Strength in Times of Crisis:
Action-Oriented Counseling
Handling The Stress of The Situation
Life is full of unexpected challenges and crises that can leave you feeling overwhelmed and uncertain. Whether you're grappling with an recent loss, trying to adapt to an unwelcome life change, or find yourself facing a personal crisis, stress and anxiety can quickly take hold, making it difficult to see a way forward, let alone envision a positive future that could be possible in the aftermath.
​
Today, you might feel...
-
Consumed with worry about the situation and its potential consequences
-
Overwhelmed by the volume of information you have to process and the number of decisions you have to make
-
Drained, but also unable to relax or put it out of your mind, even when you really try to focus on something else
-
Like you've lost the ability to enjoy yourself and feel truly happy
-
Resentful, angry, or bitter, wondering why this had to happen to you
- "Checked out" at work, in school, with your loved ones, or in other important parts of your life
- Really reactive, so even relatively minor problems bring up big, all-consuming feelings and reactions you later regret
- Trapped, and wishing you could just run away from everything
- Filled with regret and self-blame over the ways in which you might have caused all of this to happen to you
​
At first, you might have tried to ignore your feelings, thinking that if you could just deal with the immediate crisis at hand, you'd feel better. But it turned out that the problem you're facing doesn't have a quick solution, and dealing with it doesn't rid you of the hurt, anger, or fear you feel. Instead, ignoring your feelings makes them grow.... Or perhaps, you tried to make yourself feel better by ignoring the crisis itself. You were hoping it would just go away or solve itself, only to discover that avoiding the problem made it much worse. Now you really have to make a change, because you just can't continue like this. Yet, you have no clue what to do next.
​
Take the first step towards a better tomorrow
​It may not seem likely right now, but tomorrow can be better. You won't wake up tomorrow to discover it's all been a bad dream, but you may find new ways to cope, tackle problems with renewed energy, and make peace with circumstances beyond your control. With some support, you might be able to start making new choices that take you in a better direction, or identify a new vision for your future - one that feels as real as today's pain and loss.
​
How might tomorrow be different, if you could...
-
Have the mental clarity and confidence to do what needs to be done?
-
Be calm and even-keeled most of the time, even when the situation is stressful?
-
Find moments of real rest and joy, to re-charge your "batteries"?
-
Feel in control of yourself, your life, and your future?
Action-Oriented Counseling: It's exactly what it sounds like.
If someone asked you to imagine what counseling looks like, would an image of laying on a couch, talking about your childhood spring to mind? It's okay. That's a common stereotype, and there are certainly therapists who use this kind of approach. Those therapists most often use an "insight-oriented" approach to counseling. Insight-oriented counseling delves into understanding the underlying causes of a client’s thoughts and behaviors, often exploring past experiences and emotional processes. This approach aims to foster self-awareness and personal insight as a means to facilitate change. In contrast, Action-oriented counseling focuses on helping clients take specific, practical steps to address their issues and achieve their goals. This approach emphasizes developing skills and implementing strategies to achieve a specific, tangible outcome. Clients and their therapists work together to...
identify, revise, or let go of stress-inducing thought patterns,
recognize, accept, and build tolerance for difficult emotions,
develop skills to embrace and be fully present for positive experiences,
take actions consistent with personal values, even when these actions are difficult or uncomfortable.
​
Said differently, while insight-oriented approaches can help you figure out why you are struggling, action-oriented approaches can help you identify how to make the changes necessary so you start feeling better.
If a little bit of help could get you there, isn't it worth a try?
It's easier than you think:
1.
Reach Out
Call, email, or complete an online form. schedule a brief, virtual consultation (free of charge).
2.
Meet
We meet to figure out if we're a good fit, answer your questions, and discuss logistics, like availability and fees.
3.
Get to Work
We begin working together, first by coming up with a plan and clear goals, then by starting to follow that plan.
4.
Succeed
You start to move closer to your goals: building new skills, gaining perspective, and realizing your vision for the future.
Frequently asked questions about counseling:
1.
Your list includes an approach or tool I'd like to try. Do you take clients for a specific approach (e.g., EMDR)?
No. I don't take clients whose fit with me is dependent on the use of a specific tool. Whether any tool would be helpful to you is an evaluation question. It takes a bit of work to answer that question, and I don't take that work lightly. So, I would never promise that if we worked together, we'd use any specific tool. We shouldn't decide to work together based on that.
2.
Do you take health insurance?
Not yet. 'Emerge Calm' is too small to make insurance credentialing and billing feasible right now. This may change in the future. I am considered 'out of network' but you should check your plan: some plans allow out of network reimbursement, and I'll gladly provide any documentation you need for that purpose.
3.
How much do you charge? Or, what is your session fee?
My regular session fee is $150. Take a look at my fees page for reduced-fee options and other pricing information.
4.
I’m located in a different state than the ones you list (MA and MS) … But if we’re going to meet virtually, why does it matter where I’m located? Why can’t you work with clients who live in other states, or even outside the U.S.?
Licensed counselors can’t see clients virtually in states where they aren't licensed to practice, because it would constitute practicing without a license. I am licensed in MS and MA, so I can only see clients in those states. Importantly, these rules apply even when clients are on vacation - we can't meet when you are somewhere other than the states where I'm licensed.
However, some changes are expected in this realm, which may help solve many problems arising from cross-state practice (and may help you have some additional options for therapy!). Mississippi, along with 35 other states, has passed the Counseling Compact, which will enable licensed counselors to receive a practice privilege in other Compact states. When compact privilege becomes an option, I expect to expand the number of states in which I offer services, and surely, many others will do so as well.
5.
I'm concerned about someone other than myself (a friend or loved one). I think you could help them, but they aren't motivated to get help. How can I help connect them with you?
I appreciate your concern and care. However, it's important for you to know that counseling is the kind of process that just doesn't work very well if someone isn't ready to engage. I know that's frustrating to hear, but if you are concerned about someone, your best bet is to gently talk to them about your concerns and offer support. For example, you can offer to accompany a friend to their first appointment with a new counselor, or take them to a support group meeting they choose to attend for the first time. You can share a link to my website, if you think we might be a good fit, but then let the person make the ultimate decision on whether to reach out, and if so, to whom.
6.
Do you ever work with kids or with entire families?
Because my counseling practice is entirely virtual, providing therapy to younger children and entire families can be very challenging, and often less-than effective. I think that, in most cases, you are likely better off finding a provider who can do this work in person. Ideally, you may be able to access in-home therapy. However, I do regularly work with couples in crisis, and occasionally, do evaluation work for children and their families (primarily in juvenile justice or custody matters). You can learn more about the latter by visiting the evaluation page, and are welcome to reach out if you'd like to discuss a specific situation in which I may be of help.
7.
My schedule is really busy, and I'm concerned about availability. What are your hours?
Hours and availability change with some frequency - that's why they're not posted. Here are the general trends: weekday mornings are often most available, while late afternoon appointments (5pm or later) are usually booked up, and sometimes waitlisted. I generally don't schedule regular counseling appointments on weekends or after 6pm CST/ 7pm EST.